Sunday, September 21, 2008

Let's try this again...

It's been nearly a year since my last entry. I don't even think anyone else reads this. But I feel the desire to write. I've been writing stories since I was 4 years old. I took composition classes in high school, and design and communications classes in college. I can't stay away from writing.

Today we sang a new song that Rocky wrote, simply called "Inside Out." The chorus says:
Living inside out, inside out
Make the love that You've placed in me
Radiate out of me
Inside out, inside out
May every piece of my heart be entirely Yours

I feel dry. Stuck in a rut. Just so-so. Blah. Maybe it's just because of lots of things here and there that have been sucking the life out of me. School has started and Rocky is trying to stay on top of things. A friend of his family passed away this week. I'm struggling with aspects of being a deacon and on the council in our church. I've been continually biting the same exact spot on my lip when I eat (not on purpose)...

I want to break out of this, yet I don't. "I just want to be mad for awhile..." Is it ok to feel this way sometimes? Will it make me appreciate the "highs" of my life more, after being stuck in some "lows"? Or do I need to just push myself to be happy all the time, the cheerful one, the encourager, the one who always seems to have it together?
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